You are right about the necessity for management. No AI can handle it. MNO tries to tell everyone that their AI will do it, but that is simply not true. In fact, many MNO players are now telling other players to take manual control of virtually everything such as AAW/SAM defenses and re-fueling. I've always known how limited the AI is for both MNO and ANW. I just don't try to pretend the AI is something that it is not.
I found SaI one of the best (if you want to be as hands off as possible). If you play at the 'Admiral's command level' in SaI, all you need to do is issue navigation commands to the flagships and everything else will follow. A video is available for this level of command and control:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3hdq_gTT ... E012583E22The gunnery can be left to each ship's captain. However, you must control the navigation. You cannot tell your fleets to patrol an area.